I carry this thing around for laughs. I mean, literally. I’ve got a tally going. Today I’ve had 273 laughs, and I haven’t even been into the mall yet.


The lobster is definitely the winner, laughs-wise. When I first started this caper I was toting a giant cardboard cut-out of a celery stick I’d found in a skip bin at the back of Woolworths. That got quite a few laughs – enough to make me realise I was onto something – but never as many as the lobster. I carried a giant stuffed beetroot around for a while, but I found that the lobster just got a better class of laugh, so I’ve stuck with it.


I like to do my bit to make the world a bit happier. I’m a shift worker, so I’m often at a loose end in the daytime. Sometimes I find myself watching trash on the telly and I think, Nah, I’m going to go out and get some laughs. So I grab the lobster and head out. I find peak hour commute time is especially fruitful. Nobody’s laughing of their own accord there, they definitely need a bit of help. People have come to know me on the trains; they call me Cray. I think it’s a term of endearment.